I know life's not fair, really I do. I've seen the Princess Bride a hundred times. But every now and then things do even out a little, sometimes you get a little good back to balance bad you went through before.

Abby was born at the beginning of what turned out to be an awfully dark year. I can barely even remember that year; it's all sort of gray and fuzzy. She's my baby and I had hoped to be able to savor each little moment that you get that first year and hide it away in my mental scrap book. I'm sure that I did/saw/experience all those special first year moments, but I can only remember a few of them. I cried at her first birthday because I knew I had lost my chance.

Now Abby is in Kindergarten, another milestone year, and this time I think I'm getting my chance. This is the year of losing your baby teeth and learning to read and write. This is the year of heading off without Mom to play with friends and then coming back home to cuddle in her lap. There is funny joke telling and elaborate story spinning. There are all those around the house things to learn to, like how to bake and fold laundry. It's a big year.

Since the older kids are in school, I get lots of time with Abby all toby myself. We get to go on afternoon dates that cater to just her desires and play the games that are just perfect for a five year old. Abby is a funny kid and I have the time to just enjoy her crazy sense of humor and her unique perspective on life.

All those treasures that I missed the first year I feel like I'm getting back in the sixth year. I don't even mind that they're not the same treasures. Each smile, each moment is so beautiful, sometimes I feel like my heart might break from joy.